Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Fireproof a Dynamic Marriage

This past Saturday I spent two valuable hours attending the new movie release FIREPROOF. Not only was it refreshing to attend a movie without profanity and gratuitous sex and violence, but to watch a film with a tremendous message of hope, commitment, and faith.

Three weeks ago Debbie and I began attending the dynamic marriage course at the Spring Meadows Church of Christ. During our first few weeks we learned about our deepest emotional needs and Love Busters (actions and behaviors that negatively impact your marriage). Debbie quickly noted a correlation between some of the themes in the movie and some of the great lessons we are learning in class. Let me share just a few with you.

First, when there is an emotional vacuum or a negative environment in a marriage, people begin to find other ways to meet their emotional needs. Sometimes these are withdrawal, or pursuit of a hobby or activity outside the marriage. More often than not, the withdrawal can lead an individual into an affair or emotional connection to another person.

Second, many of the Love Busters mentioned in class played out in the movie. The visual representation of these actions in the movie helped us to see the negative impact of these love busters. The angry outbursts, annoying behaviors, disprespectful judgements and selfishness all played a powerful role in the struggles this young couple faced. I also appreciate that the movie did not ignore the hard topics like the affects of pornography and unfaithfulness in the film.

Finally, the message of hope that comes through is encouraging. Despite the detoriation that had taken place; when a person surrenders to God and then seeks to meet the needs of their mate wonderful things can happen.

Fireproof is a good movie because it doesn't take a Pollyanna approach to marriage. It shows the hard work that goes into making a marriage great and emphasizes the role that God must play in creating successful marriages.

I would like to encourage all the readers of this post to do three things. 1) Go and see Fireproof. If for no other reason than the fact that we need to support movies with a positive message. If we want good movies to make it to the theaters, we need to support the effort. 2) Encourage everyone else you know to go and see the movie (especially in your churhces). 3) Seek opportunities to improve your marriage. The Dynamic Marriage course from Family Dynamics (www.familydynamics.net) is a great place to begin, but look for opportunities to do all you can to make your marriage great.

Trent Wheeler